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The
Art of Flirting
by Joe Vetromile |
Flirting is the way most people determine whether or not a member
of the opposite sex is interested in them. Following is a quick
outline on how you should go about the complex, sometimes fun,
sometimes not so fun, task of flirting. It all beings with your
approach.
The Approach
One person approaches the other. They move into closer physical
proximity. This much is clear: NO approach equals NO possibility
of initiating contact. You must approach!
Example: A woman sits down next to a man in a coffee shop, or
a man stands near a woman in a dance club. This is the first step.
Once you approach, you begin looking for the signs.
The Signs
The
person who has been approached will always signal the other’s
presence in some way…a sign. This signal is not like a train
whistle, however, more a subtle body language which you can learn
to recognize. For example, he or she simply may look up, move over
to make room, nod slightly, or signal with a glancing eye contact.
A
display of total obliviousness to the one who is approaching
generally indicates lack of interest altogether. Don’t be
discouraged. But if the one you approached shows absolutely no
interest, then it’s time to re-group and try again. But let’s
say the approach works. You have your positive acknowledgement,
now what? Time to talk The Verbal Exchange
The
two people may then engage in a mild verbal exchange about impersonal,
unimportant matters such as the weather or the scene
around them. The key word here is MILD.
This
is the classic place for the clever “line,” but
cleverness is not required. At this point, a verbal exchange
is not for the purpose of sharing valuable insights about life
or
determining philosophical compatibility. It is just a vehicle
to further the developing contact.
Examples: Verbal overtures might include anything from “please
pass the pickles” to “your looking great tonight”,
to “have you seen the waitress?”. Without some form
of verbal response, it is highly unlikely that the next step
will occur. Let’s say all is going as planned. Time for
body language. Body Language
Over
a period of time, a couple that has begun to talk may also begin
to orient themselves physically to one another, to turn toward
one another until, if all is goes well, they are fully facing one
another. This is your goal.
This
step can take minutes or hours . . . or weeks or months .
. . to achieve. Yet, without this physical reorientation toward
one another, not very much can ever happen, so give up on people
who turn their back toward you for long periods of time! But
if they don’t… Touching
The
woman or the man (most often the woman) touches the other in
a light, fleeting way. Examples: A couple might
accidentally
brush their hands against one another while reaching for a drink,
or the woman might pat the man on the arm in the middle of a shared
joke. The exchange of very subtle, almost glancing touches may
continue for some while, and if all goes well, can escalate into
the casual affections shown by couples who are dating. If you’ve
reached this point, then flirting has now become the beginning
of a relationship. The Art of Flirting should always end with the
beginning of a relationship. Now get out there and flirt.
The
Art of Flirting is really the Art of making first contact. You
only have one shot at making a great first impression. By following
some of the guidelines we’ve established in this article,
you should now be equipped to locate, approach, and ascertain
whether or not your subtle flirting has opened the doors to a
new and exciting
relationship.
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My name is Joe
Vetromile, and I’m an author/screenwriter
living in So. California. I’ve written hundreds of articles
on the subjects of flirting, dating and breaking-up. Besides having
first hand experience with all three, my research on the art of
dating confirms to me that while the ritual of hooking up with
a soul-mate may be arduous at times, the end result of finding
that perfect someone to share the rest of your life with, is well
worth the effort.
Joe Vetromile
writes for DrDating – a web site for anyone
looking for love online. We have hundreds of articles, E-Books
and links to some great dating and love sites all over the world.
DrDating also offers reviews of some of the most popular dating
sites and books.
http://www.DrDating.com |
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